


Nyctophobia

by HaleStormStilinski



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Age of Consent, Anchors, Anxiety, Anxiety Attacks, Awesome Sheriff Stilinski, Bi-Curiosity, Birthday Sex, Broken, First time with a man, Hurt Stiles, It's Hard and Nobody Understands, Losing everything, M/M, Murder, Neighbors, Neighbors/friends having sex, Nyctophobia, Past Abuse, Past Child Abuse, Past Rape/Non-con, Past Relationship(s), Promiscuity, Promiscuous Stiles Stilinski, Sex, Sheriff Stilinski Knows, Sheriff Stilinski's Name is John, Stiles is almost 18, Sweet, Sweet/Hot, The fire happened but there's no werewolves, Top Derek Hale/Bottom Stiles Stilinski, Understanding, friends - Freeform
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-07-22
Updated: 2017-07-22
Packaged: 2018-12-05 04:12:01
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con, Underage
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,670
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11570073
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HaleStormStilinski/pseuds/HaleStormStilinski
Summary: Derek Hale is a 22 year old mechanic who suffers from Nyctophobia. Stiles is a 17 year old high school student whose got secrets of his own, and is known around town for his promiscuity. They see each other around Beacon Hills often, and soon become unlikely friends, and then more.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Let's just pretend Derek goes through what Isaac went through with his abuse, especially being locked into that freezer, stuff like that.
> 
> And I love Peter Hale (mainly cause he's hot, especially when Lydia brings him back in season, and his sass) he will basically be the Devil in this story.
> 
> And to note, I myself do not suffer from Nyctophobia, I used to be afraid of the dark when I was a kid, but it hasn't affected me anymore for years, I quite enjoy sleeping in total darkness and sometimes like watching TV with all the lights off, but I did have a friend/classmate who suffered with it.
> 
> She tried to face her fear, but every time she would try and sleep in total darkness or be somewhere where it was completely dark, her mind would play tricks on her and she said it would create monsters/Demons, and they wouldn't go away until she would turn the lights back on. 
> 
> (The way she described it was that thing where it's said that if you stare at your reflection in a mirror, after about 10 minutes, your mind would get bored and start creating scary images/monsters, until you look away from the mirror. That's how she described it, her mind would get bored after just a few minutes of being in the dark, and she'd start seeing monsters she still has it.)
> 
> I fear public places, being out in public, or just being in a really crowded place, I would start getting nervous, and I can't breathe sometimes. I fear being alone, the not having anyone alone, not being home alone, I'm definitely used to that, I have no problem with that. I fear strangers, I fear never being good enough and fear all my imperfections. 
> 
> Now those are not necessarily phobias, I'm not self diagnosing here, but I have been very aware of how I feel about those. For me, it's just all paranoia, I'm a very VERY paranoid person.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> How Derek became afraid of the dark and how he lives with it years later.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Let's just pretend the fire happened when Derek was 14 not 16. But then again there's some evidence that Derek was actually 18 when the fire happened (idk)

**nyc·to·pho·bi·a**

_ / , niktəˈfōbēə/_

_noun_

  1. _extreme or irrational fear of the night or of darkness._




 

#

 

> **_It's way too dark in here, it's silent as the grave  
>  It's cold and clammy, like I'm sealed into a cave  
>  There is no air in here, I'm drowning in my fear  
>  And if I close my eyes, the ground will disappear  
>  I have a chronic phobia, and up until this day  
>  There is no guarantee that it will go away_ **
> 
> **_("Nyctophobia" by Asia)_ **
> 
>  

#

It started when Derek was fourteen Sometimes his parents would be working a lot, so they'd have Uncle Peter watch over him and Laura. Which was always cool cause they loved Uncle Peter, he was fun. But after the fire that killed eleven members of their family, Peter changed.

Being the only one who survived the fire with some injuries, burns, he obtained sole custody of them. Derek and Laura were at school when the fire happened. They thought the fire was the worst thing to happen to them, but they were wrong.

Peter hardly said anything for months, hardly ate, slept, or even looked at them. But one day he just snapped. He hit Derek and dragged him by his arm, down to the basement of their new house. 

Laura was trying to help, but he just pushed her away and kept dragging him. He dragged him to this old freezer, nothing was in it. He told Derek to get inside and when Derek refused, he threatened to beat Laura senseless. So he got in. Peter told him he could come out when he thinks Derek's been a good boy, and closed the lid. 

Derek couldn't see a damn thing in that freezer, but he could hear the sounds of a metal chain moving and a lock being locked. Then he didn't hear anything else. When he tried to open the lid, it would budge just a little, but he couldn't get it. He spent the whole night in there, no food, no water. He got maybe two hours that night for sleep.

#

They never did anything wrong. They couldn't breathe around Peter without getting hurt. He would only hit them where no one could see it. For some reason, Derek would be the only one to get locked in the freezer. Laura told him Peter would lock her in a closet. 

They definitely got scars. Physical, emotional, and psychological. Derek spent a lot of time in the freezer, Laura in the closet. Sometimes Peter would keep him locked up for a whole weekend, or during any break they had with school, being left with little food and little water. Their bathroom was where they were then Peter would yell at them and call them disgusting, filthy, then make them clean their messes up. 

Derek once spent almost all of spring break in the freezer, Christmas Eve in the freezer, Halloween, his birthday, and so forth. He could've fought back, he's tried. But he was no match for Peter. And he only cooperated and tried to be a "good boy" so Laura wouldn't get hurt. 

Life with Peter was absolute Hell. And with all the time Derek spent locked into that freezer, he developed Nyctophobia, the fear of night or darkness. Every time he became engulfed in the darkness, his mind would play tricks on him. Make him see monsters that weren't there, make him scream and beg.

The more they would scream for Peter to let then out, the longer they'd be forced to stay. So they would be as quiet as they could, but sometimes, they couldn't.

Being that Laura was older than Derek, she took Derek away from Peter when she turned eighteen, and they never looked back. Laura eventually became Derek's legal guardian and they hightailed it to New York. They finished school there, went to college. Derek got his Masters in Automotive Engineering, while Laura mastered in Family Counseling. 

After graduating college, Laura now works as a Counselor for a Therapy center for families. She stayed in New York, but Derek went back to Beacon Hills and opened his own garage. Any rational thinking person would ask why Derek was crazy enough to go back to the one place where all his bad memories took place, and he has been asked that.

His answer is he can't hide or run away from it forever. Though he's sure he'll never get over his fear of the dark, he can't run from it forever. He has no idea if Peter is still alive, it's been eight years since they left. But he wasn't gonna let that bastard think he won. Derek is in control of his life, not Peter.

And besides the bad memories in Beacon Hills, there were some good ones. Beacon Hills was their home, he liked living there, even during the abuse. Beacon Hills was a good place to live, just not when you're living with the Devil.

Laura didn't think it was a good idea for him to go back, since Derek was the one that got the worst of the abuse. But since they'd fled to New York, Derek would visit with the guidance counselor at his old high school before he graduated (but never mentioned or admitted the abuse), and saw a therapist twice a week during college.

That was when he was comfortable enough to talk about what Peter did. When he told his therapist he wanted to go home, she thought it would be a good idea. He still remembers when she asked "You don't have to ask me if it's a good idea to go back home, Derek. What you should be asking is do _you_ think you should go back to Beacon Hills?" And he said he did. So he did just that.

#

It felt weird being back there. They became famous after the fire. He didn't know if anyone knew about them being abused, but he didn't care. He's a grown man, he can take care of himself and doesn't care what anyone thinks. 

Surprisingly hasn't seen Peter around since he returned. Not at his shop, not bumping into him anywhere in public, nothing. It's been a few months since he came back. Since then, he bought himself a nice little house, opened his shop (he made good money working in a shop while he put himself through school), and has almost ten guys currently working for him. He's been doing well since then.

Though he never talks to anyone about his phobia. He's sure some have noticed, but he never let's a subject on it get brought up. He doesn't go out much, especially at night, he sleeps with his light on, or just a lamp on, but has the bathroom light on. If he finds himself out at night, he hurries to get inside as fast as he can, not caring if anyone sees.

As soon as he would get home, the living room light, the kitchen light, hallway light, nearly every light gets turned on. His electric bill is insane sometimes, but better that than being in the dark. 

It's not like he hasn't tried to get over it, he _has_ tried. Numerous times. Once he tried sleeping in total darkness, and it took less than five minutes before he could feel his heart start racing, he was sweating, shaking, and felt a tight knot in his chest and felt like he couldn't breathe.

He quickly abandoned the attempt to face his fear before he broke down into a full blown _panic attack_. After other failed attempts, he was not willing to try it again. So he's sure he'll never be able to get over his fear. 


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Stiles and how he came to be who he is today.

It started when Stiles was eight. He just watched his mom die right in front of him. His dad wasn't at the hospital when she died. He showed up and Stiles was sitting outside her room, holding his head in his hands, crying.

She died from Frontotemporal Dementia. A shrinkage of the brain that leads to dementia and eventually, death. Being eight years old, Stiles couldn't understand it until he watched as the most important woman in his life, withered away. 

At first he hated his dad for not being there when she died. But his dad was his hero, and he worked hard to keep Beacon Hills a safe place.

He eventually got over it cause he couldn't stay mad at his dad. He's all he's got left besides his best friend, Scott. He can't lose either of them, he'll lose his mind if he does.

He cried for a long time, woke up screaming his dads name until he'd run in and hold him while he cried. He missed her, every day, and though his dad wouldn't admit it or bring her up, he missed her too. 

#

Things continued to change. His first traumatic hit was when his mother died, the next being when he was a week away from turning 14, when he was sexually assaulted by Jackson Whittemore. Captain of the Lacrosse and Swim team. He was a Junior while Stiles just became a Freshman.

He was an asshole to everyone, _especially_ Fresh Meat. He cornered the Freshman in one of the bathrooms and told him "Just doing some initiation, Fresh Meat." And attacked him.

He never told anyone what happened. No one walked in while it was going on, and Jackson simply got up and left. He wanted to tell someone, tell his dad, but he couldn't. If he tried to hurt Jackson, he'd get sued for everything they got, which isn't that much.

And rich boys and girls don't go to jail, nor would they stay too long. They just have Mommy and Daddy take care of everything, especially since Jacksons dad-- _adoptive dad_ \--is the best lawyer around, and is a force to be reckoned with. That and he didn't want his dad to lose his job. 

After his attack, he just swallowed hard and went back to class as if nothing happened, despite how much it hurt to move. But he bit through the pain and brushed it off. But to this day, it still eats at him. How dirty he felt, how it happened right in the middle of the day. He changed after that.

He lost trust in people, except the people he loved most, his friends, his dad. He just became a different person after that. Soon after he turned fifteen, he started having sex. A lot of it, strictly with just guys, always the bottom, but on very rare occasions, being the top.

It started out small, he slept with a couple friends, neighbors, saying he just wanted to get a little experience. it starting out with heavy make out sessions, groping, dry humping, hand jobs, blow jobs, rimming, fingering, he didn't go completely all the way (even if Jackson does technically count, he chooses _not_ to count it.) until a few months later. But after that, he soon lost count awhile, but it's definitely at least maybe thirty or so, so far. 

His dad never knew until word started spreading that his son was becoming the premiere whore of Beacon Hills. And when he came home after finding out, he. Was. _PISSED._

Stiles will never forget that conversation. Almost four hours of his dad yelling at him, then it turned to a lecture where the yelling had all but stopped. He relaxed a little when he told him he and all the guys used protection and he'd get check ups at the free clinic the next town over, and he was clean as a whistle. Physically clean, anyways. 

He got grounded for two months because of that. But he managed surprisingly well. It helped him focus more on homework or projects, he read through a few books pretty quickly, he got a job, and proved to his dad that he felt bad for lying to him and possibly embarrassing him. He even saved enough up to buy the jeep he has now after he got his license. She isn't anything flashy and she has her quirks, but she's his baby and he works hard to keep her happy. 

When he first started out, he was punishing himself for not telling his dad or for not fighting hard enough to keep Jackson from hurting him . Even after he started, he couldn't. Jackson and his dad would ruin their lives if he told.

Then by a certain point, he just stopped caring. He liked sex, especially that all his encounters after his attack, have been nothing but _consensual._  

He doesn't care what people say about him. He can fuck whoever he wants and as many guys as he wants, it's no ones business but his own. And who cares how many people someone fucks in a week, month, year, or lifetime? You only got one life, might as well live it up! 

Although he doesn't just flirt with or fuck anyone who gives him the tiniest smidge of attention, he has standards. So far it's no one above 25 (only since he's 17 now) no married men (he doesn't have the heart to ruin someone's marriage or family), and tries not to do it out of pettiness or pity.

He did have one time where some girl called he best girl friend Lydia a dumb whore (when in reality Lydia is the smartest person he's ever met, the girl could cure cancer, but doesn't like to let many people see how smart she is), and to get back at her, he seduced and rode her boyfriend like there was no tomorrow.

They're not together anymore, but he heard he was sleeping around with some other people, so it's not entirely just his fault. But that was the pettiest thing he's ever done, so far, and he doesn't regret it at all. They can make fun of him all they want, fine, but fuck with his friends or his dad? Oh yeah, you'd bet your sweet ass there would be Hell to pay. 

He's had a few relationships beyond the fucking, but didn't end well. The longest one he had was with his friend Danny for two months. He had just gotten dumped by his ex, whom Stiles fucked before he and Danny got together but didn't know, and they started going out.

It was nice, they time they had. They had sex twice but they soon realized it just felt so weirs since they've been friends since seventh grade. They ended it on good terms and remain close to this day, just closer than before. People tend to act certain ways around someone they've slept with, obviously. 

But with all the rules he has, the biggest one would have to be _**SCOTT MCCALL IS THE BIGGEST NO NO!!** _ He's known Scott since they were little, he's like a brother to Stiles, he would never do that with him. Though they have enough trust in each other for something like that, he would never cross his best friend off his human Bucket List. 

He wishes he could have a good, solid relationship. Which would be easier if he wasn't known for being Beacon Hill's resident Gay cum dumpster (that's mainly with blow jobs, anything else has protection, he's still clean though). And he's sure his reputation could be a reason for his bad dating history, but he's still hopeful. At least his friends and his dad still love him no matter what.

But if he found a good guy, a really good guy, he'd be faithful to him. Just because he fucks a lot, doesn't mean he'd be unfaithful in a relationship, he's not a monster. If he really likes or loves the guy, he wouldn't do that to him, but he's never really fallen in love, so he's have to wait any see. And whether it's soon or while he's in college or whatever, he'll remain ever hopeful to find his Mister Right. 


End file.
